Dear Prudence

OCD or Just Cautious?

It's become routine lately for friends and family to label me "OCD", and I haven't disputed that label. Until today. I googled the term, and I do not have that.

At first I bought into one or two of OCD's related disorders: Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder was looking apt except for the obsessive cleaning part, moral black-and-white part, and hoarding. I only hoard shoes. General Anxiety Disorder? Maybe re: spiders and scorpions, but that's just a common phobia that tons of people have.

Tarantula on the futon

The reasons my friends and family call me OCD doubtless are due to my long-standing pessimistic nature and need to avoid or pre-manage undesirable outcomes. A whole lot of nasty bad shit has happened to me in my life, and I believe pessimism is called for. Someone very close to me is fond of quoting "The Five P's" (Prior Planning Prevents Piss-Poor Performance) but incongruously calls me OCD and ridicules me for it. I think those five P's is nearly exactly what it is I do.

Is my glass half-empty? You're damn right it is, because checking for that in a timely manner avoids running out of gin. Or Pepsodent, or propane. (I did worry when I saw 4 tubes of Pepsodent in the bathroom drawer, but then remembered happily finding them at a Dollar Tree one day. WalMart quit carrying it.)

I also believe my pessimism looks much more dire when in close contact with those around me: free-spirited hippie types, What-Me-Worry?-ers, two or three with ADD, and Maynard G. Krebbs himself.

OCD Symptoms (examples)

• Fears re: contamination (germs, dirt). Are you kidding me? I don't even do the dishes til I run out of something, AND I'm a smoker and I have two cats and a dog that sleep with me.
• Fear of impulsively becoming violent. No, although I'm becoming more successful at venting...
• Fear of harming others through negligence. No
• Perfectionism. And this also relates to hoarders, it seems. I've lately come to accept, even embrace my flaws. I do have a need to leave the gas pump on an even number, though...
• Religious obsessions. Not hardly.
• Repetition. No. But I've always done this one thing that I've never confessed to anyone before. I finger-write. Example, I see a billboard while driving. I'll then be unconsciously forming the letters against my thigh or car seat "I-n-t-e-r-e-s-t F-r-e-e", probably for miles. I googled that and nothing came up.

I'm cautious. Prudent. Wary. Suspicious and mistrustful of proven or potential pitfalls. I am NOT eager to let the chips fall where they may, or Que Sera. If I can control (to some extent) my forward path, I'm going to do it. My trust must be earned. I will check.

First week of retirement!

I think I've been busier than intended for a brand-new retiree, but none of it's been labor, really. It's been a great week, I did NOTHING I didn't truly want to do. What a concept!

Went to the beach about 5 times, mostly scavenging for shells and bones. Planning another lighted skull/bones wreath for the casita.

At least a dozen impromptu cocktail hours where friends drop by so we drop everything and sit and chat. Not that we're ever doing anything that we have to drop...

Had dinner at Pancho's Friday (Dos Caramelos, a Chimichanga, and Tecate cerveza)and lunch at Pargo Rojo yesterday (Scallops in butter/garlic, and a Michelada).

Went shopping the segundas in Calle Doce twice, needed shelves and hooks for the bathroom and shower. Didn't find much in that department, but tons-o-other crap. Sheepskin rug for $5! It doesn't even smell bad!

Jan makes these Redneck Wineglasses from crystal candlesticks and Mason Jars. I LOVE them! I'll take orders for her, message me if you want to buy some, $5.

Here we are at an impromptu cocktail hour, I believe this one was actually at an appropriate hour for cocktails. Sometimes they're in the morning...

Larry, Patricia, and Jan. I'm admiring my tan line.

Our ATV is out of commission until we get a new battery for it, apparently an unusual size unavailable here. Going home to Show Low for the weekend, will get one there. I've been riding around on the back of Jan's.

The outside of the casita addition got painted yesterday, along with the garage (which I found out is now referred to as THE BODEGA, not the garage.) Luis did it all in 3 hours. PLUS he brought pizza!

Street side with gravel pile

Ocean side

Bodega with junk pile from construction, and idle ATV.

Street side with bodega

Neighborhood dogs like to sit on my roof. (Click to enlarge this one.)

And this one's extra special: the exclusive Mexican shower electrical outlet!

Ocean side again, with garden. The littler dog on the roof is my Sofia.

 For those who haven't seen these on Facebook already, 

New bedroom

Bedroom, closet, and shower.

Red Wicker Dresser!

Still to come: the thatched palapa roof needs re-thatching. The inside (bedroom, closet, bath) still needs painting. Maybe a nice darker grassy green floor and medium blue walls? I still need that desk and shelving unit built by mi esposo, master woodworker (my crafts are all in the bodega). Need another closet rod. I need to decide if that electrical outlet IN the shower will be a problem. (I think if I put a towel rack above it, and a towel covers it, it'll be OK? It's a big shower, 5 X 6 feet and 9 feet high.) Need one of those over-the-toilet shelving rack things, because those walls are hay bale and won't hold anything heavy.

But most of all:    I WANT MY ATV!!!  

A Dialysis Nurse Retires

Found my cap!

After 36 years as a dialysis nurse, I only have two more shifts to work. Over the years, I've often been asked if I recommend this area of nursing as a career. I don't, never have.

• It's physically demanding: long hours, no sit-down tasks, fast-paced and high stress. It's a young person's job, and I'm 60. When I was young, there were no 60 years old nurses still doing this. I really do pity the people that have to work with me. Sometimes.
• It's really sad: 90% of the patients die. Usually within 5 years. There's no cure, only the hope of a transplant.
• An outpatient hemodialysis clinic is not a very happy place, the patients all hate going there and it affects one's mood.
• The money's good, but the health insurance is abysmal.

It's never boring, though. And if it gets too repetitive, there are many areas within nephrology nursing to try. My favorite job of all time? Pediatric Nephrology Coordinator at UCSD. Those kids and babies were delightful, for the most part, as were the Pediatric Nephrologists and other nurses.
Second favorite: Inservice nurse for the largest dialysis supplier. I got to fly somewhere Monday morning, train staff all week, fly home Fridays. Rarely had to see those people again.
Third favorite: teaching patients how to do dialysis at home. Except that one required too much on-call. I became their mother, and they had my phone number.
Least favorite: teaching staff to become dialysis Patient Care Techs. At least 3/4 of them wash out once they discover that actual work, thinking, planning, and responsibility are required.

I will not miss it, just the money. But thanks to Viet Nam, my spouse makes enough for us to live out our retirement on the beach in Mexico. Come visit us!

On the roof, watching the ocean.

Shelling

ATV-ing

On the roof again.

Got that!

I came to Show Low AZ to work for 3 years. We wanted to buy a summer place (for when it's too hot in Mexico), we wanted a boat, and we wanted to expand the casita.

Done. In ONE year! Thanks to the kind folks where I've been worked nearly to death...

I'll be leaving soon, just need another couple of paychecks for a small cushion.

Ron's Boat

New boat next to my tiny car

24 foot Skipjack

Happy Boat-Owner!

The boat's name is Crap-Shooter. Bought locally in Kino, housed at the Finisterra where they tractor you back and forth to the ramp, and will clean your fish, change your oil, make repairs etc. if requested. For a fee, of course. I have stocked up on Scopalamine patches for my seasickness. I have not been out on the boat yet. When I went down a few weeks ago, there was only one day that was NOT a "Red Flag" day, and I was sick that day. Soon!

Casita Addition!

Instead of $10 grand to build a new casita on top of the garage, for 1/2 that we decided to add a bedroom/shower/closet to the house, move the toilet to the existing shower, and add a sink where the toilet is. Construction is underway, should be done in just a few weeks. Mi amigas and I will need to find a dresser and nightstands at the segundas!

Rebar, sand, gravel

Big load of gravel

It'll work fine.

Plus our summer home in the mountains of Arizona.

My nest. Like my new pillows?

Oh yes, one more addition. We have a puppy. She's a Mexi-dog, runt of the litter, very bonded to Ron, seems smart, and is a cuddler. Her name is Sofia. She rides on the ATV. I LOVE HER!

So I will soon be going home! It's all I can think about.

Christmas in Show Low

If you're one of my Facebook friends, you've seen all this.

I've not been blogging as much lately, and just realized I'd never shown you all my new sofa. It's from a consignment shop here in Show Low, and was exactly what I wanted and in perfect condition.
So here's my new living room, all dressed up for the holidays.

I killed those big coleus plants. Oh well. Found the combination footstool/coffee table covered basket at an antique store here, perfect with that large tray on the floor next to the sofa. And the leather director's chair in the foreground was on Craigslist.

The sofa's burgundy, and those drapes have burgundy stripes in them. I think  white walls will make them pop more.

Taken when I still had Rocky, that's his feeding trough on the floor.

Handmade stuffed cat. Kinda quirky, no?

So except for getting those dark paneled walls painted white, it's how I like it now. And I'm leaving the tree up for a while, it comforts me.

My Mexico Vacation

After my work-comp knee injury, the surgeon released me for "mostly-sitting" light duty at work. They didn't have any of that, so I packed up the cat and went home to Kino for a month.

By the way, did you know these roadside things are NOT tiny bathrooms? Ask me how I know.

The first few weeks were great! All of Mi Amigas were there, and it felt SO good to spend time with them. Among the highlights: (Click on photos to enlarge for details)

Segunda-ing

Those junk shops still amaze me. I usually drive, because you may need a large truck in the event of large purchases. The trips usually include lunch and the grocery store. One trip, I needed furniture for the screen-porch-in-progress. They had it all. I got a table with 4 chairs and a glider with 2 ottomen. And 1/2 way home the glider and a couple of chairs fell out of the back of the truck. And we didn't even load it! No permanent damage, in fact, one chair landed upright on the center divider!

Glider, Ottomen, Ron, Jaq, and Buddy (eating the chips he spilled.)

Table and chairs, with Christmas tree. See my ivy? On the screen.

Karen, Jan, and Delfie, after a hard day Segunda-ing.

Dinners Out

SO much better than dinners in (my cooking, you know...) Mi favorito is Pancho's. Pancho is a family man that opens up his kitchen evenings. Outdoor seating, usually chilly after sunset, but to-die-for food. 

John and Bette

Sal and Al

Jan and John

Chilly but full diners!

Ron, Delfie, and Jose

Pancho, owner and chef.

My Surprise 60th Birthday Lunch

This got a bit messed up. Because the date really was a surprise, I messed it all up by canceling my planned lunch date with Maggy. (It was while my cat was trying to die, and I just needed to stay in and wallow.) That date was a ruse, turned out. All hell broke loose: IM's and emails flying, as no phone service where we all live. Finally Jan came over and had to tell me about the party. It was great! I got SO many presents. Jan's invitations stipulated either a thrift store gift, or a re-gift, something used. I actually got a pair of socks: hand-knitted wool socks that Joan said do not work out well in Mexico, but felt I'd appreciate them in Show Low. How right she was! I also got the obligatory Depends and pill organizer, a homemade quart of Kahlua, a fun fish-shaped chip/dip that I'd recently admired on someone's table, beachy wall plaques, a huge framed print of a sleeping polar bear, and tons more!

Birthday girl and Maricela. They reneged on the male strippers I'd ordered,I only got photos...

Secret Santa Lunch

10 of us, a five dollar gift for the name you draw, alcohol, good food. This year's was at Pargo Rojo.

Delfie got spreaders, Bette and Joan in background

Jill got a plaque (curious, made near Show Low...)
Click on photo to read it.

Back row: Bette, Delfie,Karen, me, Joan
Front row: Jill, Sally, Joyce, Jan, and Nell.

Craft Fair

I didn't bring my stuff down, so I was appointed Jan's helper and cashier. I mostly shopped, though. Got turquoise ostrich Tony Lama boots, all-broke-in, fit like they were made for me.

Tony Lama's

Joan, shopping at Nell's embroidered shirts booth.

Maurice, looking for food.

Lunch at Casa Blanca after the craft Fair.

In between all those events were lazy days sitting on the new screen porch, shelling on the beach, or just giggles and cocktails with mi amigas. Lots of ATV rides (there's a place for my cane on it).

It was both a wrench and a blessing to come home to Show Low after losing Rocky. I was positive I could never go through that again, but I'm bereft without him and want another one. Looking at shelters for an older male that needs me as much as I need him. I figure if I get an older one, I might not get as attached to him, knowing I wouldn't have him forever?

Yeah, right.